


The Acceptable Answer

by starrnobella



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternative Universe - Non Magical, Angst, Explicit Language, F/M, Muggle Life, Real Life, Texting, no happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-24
Updated: 2017-05-31
Packaged: 2018-11-04 06:18:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 5,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10985118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starrnobella/pseuds/starrnobella
Summary: Even when the relationship has been over for a long time, sometimes boundaries get crossed and things get said that can lead to many things going unsaid. COMPLETE





	1. Preface

This is my author's note for the whole story. I know you aren't supposed to use a chapter as an author's note, but I'm making this my one exception.

There are a total of nine parts to this story. They are all relatively short and easy to read. I will be updating every day until it is complete. I will be posting Part 1 right after this chapter so that you can get a feel for the story.

This is something very different from my normal style of writing. It's in first person and I owe my life to xxDustNight88 for making sure that it makes sense. She has been my cheerleader and the one encouraging me to post this story because there is a large part of me that did not want to put this out in the world.

It's my first attempt at writing in first person, so please be gentle. This story holds a special place in my heart.

If you enjoy what you are reading, please leave a review. It lets me know I'm doing something right. Also if you enjoy my writing, be sure to check out my author's page and group on Facebook! I'd love to have you there.

Love always,

~starr


	2. Part 1

_~ Daphne ~_

**Theo:** You're keeping something from me…

**Daphne:** I know I am ...That's what makes it fun…

**Theo:** Grrrrrr….

**Daphne:** Oh what are you growling at?

I smiled stupidly at my phone for a few moments as I waited for his reply. After a beat, however, I threw my phone across the bed in frustration.

Why did I do this to myself?

All that the conversation between us was able to accomplish was him getting off, and my mind filling with images of the two of us. His mind would likely be filled with images of someone else, I was almost entirely sure of it.

I heard my phone buzz, signalling his reply, so I reached forward, grabbing the phone before sliding down on my bed to rest my head on the pillow. I tugged my blanket across my lap before swiping to open his message.

**Theo:** Nothing

I wasn't sure why I had expected a different answer from him. It was always the same. My response most likely would be something along the lines of _suuuuuuureeeee_ or _lol_ and the conversation would slowly die off. Shrugging, I typed my message and sent it off.

No matter how hard I have thought about it, I can't figure out why I'm still drawn to him. There is absolutely no reason for me to have any emotions left for the man who broke my heart. No reason for me to want to talk to the guy who cheated on me in the ending months of my relationship with him. Or at least that's what the rumors said.

Our relationship hadn't lasted very long, but for me it was the longest to date, and for the most part, I was happy. Sure we had our fair share of fights, but it wasn't anything that any other couple hadn't gone through before. Disagreements about the stupidest of things, though, could turn into the harshest of fights.

Our worst had been just weeks before we had broken up for good. I'd asked him to leave behind a vicious friendship with a girl that tore apart the relationship of our close friends. That couple, however, had been lucky enough to work things out. When I suggested to him that the friendship with Millie was a dangerous one, he lashed out at me and basically told me that there was nothing wrong with him going to comfort her when she needed it. Besides, it was Millie that told him not to break up with me in the first place when the worst of the fighting began a few weeks prior.

God forbid I point out to him that if this situation was exactly the same as him telling me that I needed to cut all ties with Ron after we had started dating. My friendship with Ron was completely harmless in my opinion, but Theo had decided that it was the one line that if I crossed it, then we were over. Apparently, I wasn't allowed to talk a close friend from high school down off the edge and save him from committing suicide. That just wasn't an acceptable reason for me to worry about another guy.

As I waited to see if he would actually message me back, my mind started running through the list of things that I was keeping from him. Where would he like me to begin? The list just kept adding to itself each and every time we talked.

I always typed out what I wanted to say to him, but then I would erase and send the "acceptable" answer happily, and act like the clueless moron I'm guessing he thought that I was.

The acceptable one.

The one that wouldn't fuck up the understanding we currently had.

One that wouldn't admit to still having unresolved feelings for each other, and prove to him that he wasn't happy in the relationship he was in, even if they _were_ living together.

The answer that wouldn't tell him that I missed him and the person that he made me become.


	3. Part 2

_~ Theo ~_

I'm not sure why I still want to talk to her. I've happily moved on and am living with a great girl, but there's something about her. A feeling that I just can't shake. Every time her name appears on my phone, I smile. Who knows why other than I know that I might be able to get a nice story out of her.

 _Buzz. Buzz._ Speak of the devil. Let's see what she has to say now.

 **Daphne:** Lol

Her typical go-to answer. I don't know why I was expecting her to say anything else. I guess I backed her into a corner. Not that I have helped the situation at all.

Still, she makes me smile. She knows what I like and how to use her words to prove that she knows what I like.

Looking at the time on my phone, I realize that Millie will be home any minute. Guess I'm done talking to to Daphne for a while. As I slide her message across to open my phone, I hear the door open.

Shit. Guess I'll delete the messages later. That's the last thing I need right now. Millie gets jealous enough as it is, no need to make things worse for me. I'd like to have sex tonight anyways.

I quickly type a response back to Daphne as I slip my phone into my pocket just seconds before Millie walks through the door. Looks like she's had a rough day which means I just missed my chance for any kind of action tonight.

I guess I should tread lightly with my answers of choice tonight. At least until Millie goes to bed, anyways. I can always message Daphne then. Hopefully she'll still be awake. If not, I guess I'm really out of luck for the evening. Maybe Millie will be in a better mood when she wakes up.

The slam of the door brings my concentration back to the current moment. Millie just locked herself in the bathroom. Tonight is going to suck.

Sometimes I wish things were like they used to be. I wish that things were simpler and I didn't have to tread carefully with my words. Daphne never made me feel this way when she would have a bad day.


	4. Part 3

_~ Daphne ~_

Lying awake at night, thinking about him is one of the worst experiences I've ever had the luxury of dealing with. Seeing his eyes every time I close my eyes just hurts. I know that I should be over him; hell, we will have been broken up for four years soon.

It's not that I haven't tried to get over him. Sometimes, I swear he's like an addiction that I just can't break. We don't talk for weeks, sometimes even months, and all it takes is one message from him to bring me crawling back to him on my knees. I'm pretty certain that's his favorite way for me to come to him.

My phone buzzes. Another message from him. Probably a quippy response to me sticking my tongue out at him in the picture I sent. I should probably be more selective about when I send that to him. I'm not in the mood to play games tonight.

**Theo:** That tongue again...

**Daphne:** What about it? Lol ;)

Why did I send that? I'm just asking for trouble aren't I?

Shaking my head, I tossed my phone off to the side and rubbed my hands over my face. I just opened a world of trouble and it looks like I won't be going to sleep at a normal hour tonight. Time to get thinking about what scenario I'm going to send him tonight.

_Buzz buzz_. Damn phone. Go away. I shouldn't be talking to him right now.

**Theo:** Trouble

**Daphne:** Yeah? What about it? :P

**Theo:** Nothing

I roll my eyes as I type my reply. I might as well play along for the night. It should keep the boredom away for a little while at least. Something to tide him over for a while and fill my mind with images of something that can never be mine. Just what I wanted to do for the rest of my evening.

Looking back over the last few messages between us, I can't help laughing at myself. I do have a penchant for trouble. I like causing it. I like being in the middle of it, and I like being the reason for it existing. All in very specific situations however. It's more fun when I cause trouble for other people rather than causing trouble for myself.

No matter what the situation, the trouble always seems to come back to my tongue and the way that I am using it. Usually it's a toss-up between the words I choose to say and the actions I decide to do. When it comes to Theo, he prefers my actions but he'll settle for my words when he can get them. Especially since he's not getting much of that kind of action playing house with little miss princess. Even if Theo thinks that he's the only one who has been introduced to the antics my tongue can play, that isn't the case at all.

Thinking back over it all now, I probably should have made better choices with my exploits upon our break up. Although, I don't think it really would have changed a thing. The longer I think about it, the more I realize that there are a few more things that I keep hiding from him. Even when he asks me a direct question about it.

He knows about the night that I invited Blaise over to my house around three am for no damn good reason other than for me to have a good time. That night was fun, except for the fact that I have to watch what I say around certain people because not all of them know the truth. That night with Blaise was an eye opening experience for me. We had been flirting on and off since we met, but that's just how he was, and I, of course, was going to return the favor.

And I'll be the first to tell you, that man is damn good with his tongue too. Theo should really take a few lessons from him in that department. Might be able to actually make Millie smile for once. The damn sourpuss.

I'm still not sure what spurred on the conversation that led to me inviting him over when I should have been sleeping. He had a girlfriend for crying out loud. I knew how it felt to be cheated on, and unfortunately, I knew how it felt to be the one doing the cheating. Now, I was becoming the other woman. Let me tell you, that feeling absolutely sucks. Especially when you are friends because you know you are lying to them no matter what you say.

But I did it anyways. That might be a reason that a lot of people don't really have much to do with me. What's that old saying again? Once a cheater, always a cheater? Yeah, but sometimes people change. I've been trying to change, and in fact, for the longest while I had changed. Then, Theo came crashing back into my life.

I hear my phone buzz at the corner of my bed and sigh as I reach for it. This damn thing has caused enough trouble for one night revolving around the non-existent relationship that I'm in. It has been the source of most of our fighting, even after we broke up and it has been the source of our reconnection over the last few years.

An innocent conversation about a bad day turned into rebuilding a friendship that was broken at the hands of some empty words. Or at least, the words on my end were empty, who knows about the ones that came from him. That rebuilt friendship led to rekindling a flame that had laid dormant for months.

A flame that, to this day, I wish I could extinguish again or completely avoid having it ever lit in the first place.

**Theo:** What kind of trouble do you feel like getting into tonight?

Well, isn't that a loaded question.

Sometimes I wish that we had never started talking again. There's not a day that goes by anymore that I don't think about him. I think about the pain he's caused. I think about the smiles that he was the reason behind. I think about what could have been had I only spoken up when I decided to stay quiet.

Sometimes the acceptable answer is the one that hurts you the most.


	5. Part 4

_~ Theo ~_

Waiting for a reply from Daphne is like waiting for the paint to dry or a pot of water to boil. Sometimes I wonder if she's fallen asleep on me. Usually when that thought does cross my mind, I tend to be right. Everytime she does that to me, I think about when she used to do it while we were dating. Man, did that piss me off.

I guess I never gave much thought to her sleep schedule. Just because I would stay up until all hours of the night didn't mean that she did. Sleeping schedules, especially when we were apart, all seemed to be a topic of argument for some bizarre reason.

Some of the arguments that we got into over something so stupid were just insane. There was one time that I didn't talk to her for an entire trip home from a mini vacation because I was too pissed at her for falling asleep on me the night before. All I wanted to do was sneak out and go for a walk on the beach with her. Just hold her under a starlit sky and watch the waves roll in. Is that too hard to ask?

No, she should have known it would irritate me. There were days I wondered if she'd do it on purpose. Days that she didn't think my story telling was nearly as impressive as her's. I don't have the gift of words that she does, but my stories were damn good. I know they painted images in my mind that helped me fall asleep at night.

Maybe that's why she was falling asleep on me…

The buzzing of my phone pulled me back to reality and out of my thoughts. Eagerly, I picked up my phone only to see Millie's name flashing across the screen. She's spending the weekend at home, leaving me alone in our flat. I know that I shouldn't be waiting on messages from my ex-girlfriend, but come on now, a guy has needs and she's willing to help me.

As I'm responding to Millie's message, Daphne's name flashes at the top of my phone. A wicked grin grows on my face as I click over to see what she's sent.

**Daphne:** What kind of trouble would you like?

Isn't that a loaded question? There are a lot of options when it comes to the kind of trouble, but only a few of them are fun. I'll let her wait a little bit for an answer. She made me wait.

Fair is fair.


	6. Part 5

_~ Daphne ~_

For the life of me, I cannot figure out why I wait around for a response from him. I was doing fine before I met him, and then I was doing fine a few months after we had broken up. I was finally able to get my life back on track. I was done dealing the anxiety that came from being separated from my friends because he didn't like them. I was beginning to rebuild relationships that I thought were broken and could never be repaired. I was finally back to looking for the next guy that I could possibly see a future with. One full of happiness and hopefully a house with a family of my own.

Unfortunately, one small interaction is enough to bring me back down this stupid fucking rabbit hole that I have no business being stuck in. It's been four years. He had a chance to come back to me. But he told me no. He told me that he didn't want to be with a drunken bitch who celebrated her birthday just a little too hard. It wasn't my fault everyone was buying me drinks. They all knew I needed them.

I should be moved on and happy with someone else by now. Except here I am, waiting and hoping that I get a message from him every so often. Hoping that just once we could have an honest conversation.

Except that conversation has to be done face to face. There's no way just text messages back and forth would convey the exact feelings that still seemed to linger between us. It was a conversation that would most likely never happen because we were at different points in our lives.

He is living with his girlfriend and I am living with friends. He has moved on with his life and I am still basking in the glory of a time that has since past. He seems happy and I can feel my depression sinking back in.

 **Theo:** I mean, I prefer the fun kind. But it's up you.

It's always up to me. I hate when he says that. If it were up to me, we'd still be together and he wouldn't be dating _her_. We would have an apartment of our very own and I'd have the most beautiful engagement ring on my left hand. We would finally be settling down and starting a family of our very own.

Happy for once.

Unfortunately, that's not the answer he wants to hear. He wants me to start some sexy banter back and forth, so that he's able to sleep at night when _she_ goes to bed early and leaves him with a nasty case of blue balls. So of course, the logical answer is to seek out the assistance of your ex-girlfriend.

Makes me wonder when that became the acceptable thing to do to a person.


	7. Part 6

_~ Theo ~_

Sometimes I miss living back home. There was always a place for me to escape to when Millie got to be a little too much to handle. Which was most nights, but for the most part we are happy. Well, we don't go to bed angry every night.

There are so many times I find my thoughts drifting back to Daphne. I know that they shouldn't, but they do. I can't help it. She made me happy once too. I can't think of a night where we went to sleep in the same bed angry.

Sure we had our fair share of fights, but what couple doesn't? Show me a couple that doesn't fight and I'll show you two liars who are faking being happy just for the sake of being in a relationship. Actually, I think it would be kind of funny to see a relationship that didn't fight.

Now that I think about it though, Daphne and I didn't fight for the first month and a half that we were dating. Plus, we didn't fight before we started dating, but there really isn't anything to fight about when you are just fucking. Other than maybe who was on top, but that usually was me. Not that I was complaining. There was no reason to argue. I was still getting laid. At least until you start developing feelings.

I can still remember the night that I asked her to be my girlfriend. For some odd reason we were both up way later than usual. Just hanging out in bed. I looked over at her and saw a big smile on her face and I knew. I knew that there was something special there. Something that I wanted to investigate further. Something fun.

Unfortunately, the night we broke up still is also pretty clear in my memory. The tears that rolled down her face still haunts my dreams. The pain in her voice still plays in the back of my mind from time to time. Some nights I contemplate sending her an apology, but that's something I'd rather do face to face. You know, if I ever got the chance.

 _Buzz buzz. Buzz buzz._ Double? Must be urgent.

Flipping my phone over, I see that it's not urgent. However, it's two messages. One from Millie and one from Daphne. It takes me a couple seconds but I slide one of the messages open.

 **Millie:** The shower is awful lonely. Wanna join? ;)

Undoubtedly. I guess lonely showers can do wonderful things for a person's mood. Tossing my phone aside, I'm out of the living room and into the bathroom in no time flat. Discarding my clothing as I go. Never giving a second thought to my phone and the other message sitting there.

Well, that was until I got into the shower. Now I have to make a choice.

Do I stay here and have shower sex with my girlfriend or do I go check the message from my ex?

My cock is giving me it's input as it hardens at the thought of my girlfriend naked in the shower waiting for me…

There is no good answer here. Making the other choice ends in three people getting hurt. Going with this decision results in only one.

I'll take my chances. I'm sure Daphne will forgive me. I'll come up with something to tell her.

 **Daphne:** All you have to do is ask for what you want…


	8. Part 7

_~Daphne~_

Checking the time on my phone for the millionth time, I see that it's almost two am and here I am stupidly waiting for the next message to come in from him. Knowing my luck, he probably went to sleep.

I don't know why it bothers me that he fell asleep on me. It's not like we are trying to make plans or anything. We are just looking for some virtual company to help us both drift off to sleep for the evening. Although I'd much rather have some physical connections right about. It's been far too long since the last time I got any kind of action other than that of a battery operated toy. And, of course, that action had been the absolute shittiest experience I have ever had.

Ron and I were definitely just meant to be friends and nothing more. Not that I have talked to him since our awkward encounter. I haven't exactly wanted to talk to him. How can you not realize that you aren't actually having sex and are just dry humping my thigh for fifteen minutes? I did not want to take control of the situation, but I did because I want some chance at getting off that day. Even if I did have to finish the job when I got back home.

Worst fifteen minutes of my life.

The answer that morning when he invited me over should have been a resounding no, but I got curious. I think we built things up way too much and both of us ended up highly disappointed with the results. He and Lavender seem happy now though, so at least he should be happy with the way that things panned out. I'm glad it worked out for him.

Resisting the urge to check my phone, I pull my blankets up over my head in a desperate attempt to fall asleep. I'm sure he'll be visiting my dreams tonight like he always does, even though it'd be nice for once to not dream about him.

Some days I wish we could go back to the simple days when we were just fucking and then falling asleep. It may have been in our best interest to not spend the night together afterwards. Especially after how rocky of a start we had.

It started out innocent and fun, just harmless flirting and playful banter between two friends. Two friends who happened to develop feelings for each other after some time had passed, even though just like now he had a different girlfriend when we first started talking.

That probably should have been my first clue that things weren't going to work out between us. Little too late to come to that conclusion I guess.

Anyways, it was all innocent when it first started. He and his girlfriend had broken up not long after we started talking. For the longest time, everything was clean and innocent. Just two friends getting to know each other. Then, a simple sentence was taken a different way from how it was meant leading to the conversation taking a turn for the more interesting and the more playful.

Finally, I start drifting off to sleep, but before I fall asleep completely I grab my phone and shoot a quick text off to Theo. Then he can't get mad at me for falling asleep on him. I told him what happened.


	9. Part 8

_~ Theo ~_

"Don't take too long, Theo."

I wave her off and mumble something about just grabbing my phone before coming to bed. That's only a half truth. I want to see if Daphne has messaged back. We were just getting to the good part of the conversation when I disappeared.

I'll apologize for it later. She'll understand. She always does. That was one of the best things about her. She never stayed mad for long. At least it seemed that way anyways.

I still remember the night that I probably scared the ever living hell out of her. I have a temper. I'll be the first to admit that and I don't always handle my anger well. It wasn't like she'd done anything to irritate me. In fact, she was the one that they probably should have called when things started getting heated between Pansy and me at the Quidditch pitch.

Maybe if the damn bitch wouldn't have lied to our fucking prefect I wouldn't have had to talk with Snape about my issues. Everything could have just passed under the rug and Daphne never would have been involved.

That night back at the dormitory, I wish Draco would have just left well enough alone and hadn't gone to get Daphne to calm me down. It was the biggest part of myself that I wish she never had to see. I broke a lot of stuff that night and I'm pretty sure if you look close enough you can see the indent where my bludger bat hit the wall.

I still owe her an apology for that night. Although at this point I owe her apologies for things much worse than a night where my temper got the better of me. The list could go on for miles if I actually sat down to think about it. I wasn't the best boyfriend in the world. Hell, I'm still not and for some reason Millie lives with me and Daphne still talks to me any time I text her.

**Daphne:** Couldn't keep my eyes open. Ttyl. Night.

Well shit. Guess that's not happening tonight.

"Theo."

Glancing back over my shoulder I see the very naked form of my girlfriend.

Fuck it. I don't know what the acceptable response would be to her message, so I throw my phone back onto the couch after deleting all of Daphne's messages and make my way to bed with Millie.

Tomorrow's another day.

I can always come up with some kind of excuse for why I disappeared.


	10. Part 9

_~Daphne~_

And that's the way the cookie crumbles I guess.

I checked my phone as soon as I woke up and found nothing more. Going back to my messages screen, I slide the opposite way on his name, revealing the delete button.

I begin to contemplate if I really want to be reminded of the unfinished conversation we had last night as my finger hovers over the red square. I haven't deleted any of his messages since the day we broke up.

I have them all.

Every hurtful name. Every curse word thrown at me because I fucked something up. Every angry rant that he has ever sent in the last four years. Every sweet message on days that he knows I'm feeling down. Every single dirty message that we've exchanged.

I know what we are doing is wrong and I know that I shouldn't still feel something for him. However, that doesn't change the fact that it happens. It was the way we started out and it is almost ceremonial that it is the way our physical relationship has ended. I don't regret a minute of it and I don't care if that makes me a horrible person. It's how I'm dealing with the loss of someone who changed me into a better person. It's how I get by when my anxiety overcomes me and I don't want to talk to anyone else.

I may not have all the answers, but at least I know that even though there are so many thoughts that go unspoken, I have someone who is always in my corner rooting me on when I feel like I am failing.

The truth is hidden in the silence.

Someday I wish that it would come to light.

But until then, I will continue living my life in a series of acceptable answers.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Missing Pieces](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12387570) by [starrnobella](https://archiveofourown.org/users/starrnobella/pseuds/starrnobella)
  * [P.S. - I Hope You're Happy](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13385682) by [starrnobella](https://archiveofourown.org/users/starrnobella/pseuds/starrnobella)




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